Opposites Attract
by Elf Dragon
Summary: After having their relationship questioned far too many times Squall and Rinoa retaliate...chaos ensues.


Disclaimer: I own neither Final Fantasy nor the song that caused this chaos.

Opposites Attract 

By Elf Dragon

Zell is sitting at a table with Irvine, waiting for Squall.

"So what are we here for, Irvine?" Zell asked for the tenth time.

Irvine stopped stabbing a candle with his knife then switched it with Squall's.

"I told you, midget, it's a year since we saved the world, we are having a guys' night out, and the girls are babysitting us."

He pointed at a table where the girls were talking and, of course, watching them.

"But they won't admit it".

Squall walked in to the bar and read the big red sign.

"Oooooh, Big Red Sign" he said. "Get up and sing night"

He walked slowly to the table, glancing at the girls and at Rinoa, who looked drunk and giggly but he didn't care - she always did.

"Hi," he said, taking a seat and his coke. He took a big long drink, switching his knife with Zell's while he wasn't looking.

"Hey," Irvine said, looking at Selphie. "You know it's been a year and a half since we met the girls?"

Squall nodded slowly. Zell opened his mouth straight away.

"What I don't get is how you've lasted so long with Rinoa. I mean, you're opposites, ya know?"

Elsewhere in the bar, a purple dinosaur ran past the girls table, crying. Selphie stood up.

"I'm gonna give him a Selphie hug."

Quistis and Rinoa grabbed her, not wanting half a dinosaur running around.

"You're mean," she cried. Rinoa saw a tantrum coming. She looked around.

"Look, Selphie - Irvine!"

Quistis pointed. The little girl's head popped up straight away.

"Irvy?"

Then she quickly sat up. Rinoa listened to the singer, who was trying to sing _Eyes on Me._ She laughed her head off. Quistis was arguing with Selphie.

"What ya talking about?" Rinoa asked.

"You and Squall," Selphie said.

"What?" she said, her face going red.

"Well, you're both really different -loud and quiet, messy and neat."

Quistis giggled. Rinoa walked over to the bar and met Squall.

"Hey," he said.

"Hey. Quistis is so drunk. How about we give up the separate night and get everyone together," she asked.

He nodded, and then went to tell everyone.

She went and talked to the owner - a blonde man with a white coat - who was talking to the to bouncers - a guy and girl.

"So where's Rinoa?" Irvine asked as Selphie sat on his lap.

Squall shrugged. Seifer walked on stage.

"Will Mister Squall Leonhart please come to the stage door? Please enjoy my bar. Thank you."

Squall walked up to the door and met Rinoa. She smiled and started talking very fast.

Seifer jumped off the stage.

"Hey, Chicken-wuss, can you do Fujin and Raijin's job for a little while? I know you can."

Zell went to the door and the Bouncers went to the stage. Raijin went to the drum set and Fujin to the keyboard.

"Another song tonight. Here it is," Seifer said, walking over to the guitar.

Rinoa came on smiling at her friends. She turned and ran off, then came back dragging Squall. She smiled. He frowned. The fast music started. Rinoa swung side to side. Squall brought his hand through his hair.

**Rinoa**: Baby, seems we never, ever agree. You like the movies and I like TV.

**Squall**: (swinging around) I take things serious, and you take em light.

**Rinoa**: I go to bed early,

**Squall**: and I study all night.

(They lean on each other.)

**Both**: Our friends are saying,

**Squall**: we ain't gonna last, 'cause I move slowly

**Rinoa**: and baby, I'm fast.

**Squall**: I like it quiet,

**Rinoa**: and I like to shout!

**Both**: But when we get together it just all works out.

(They face each other.)

**Rinoa**: (stepping forward) I take two steps forward,

**Squall**: (walking back) I take two steps back.

(Rinoa grabs Squall's hand, at arm's length)

**Both**: We come together (Rinoa twirls into his arms)

**Squall**: 'cause opposites attract, and you know,

**Rinoa**: It ain't fiction,

**Squall**: just a natural fact.

**Both**: We come together cause opposites attract. (They come apart) Who'd a thought

**Rinoa**: we could be lovers. He makes the bed,

**Squall**: and she steals the covers.

**Rinoa**: He likes it neat,

**Squall**: and she makes a mess. I take it easy.

**Rinoa**: Baby, I get obsessed. He's got the money (she reaches into his pocket pulling out money)

**Squall**: (shoving it back in, angrily) and she's always broke.

**Rinoa**: I don't like cigarettes

**Squall**: and I like to smoke. (He gestures with his hand)

**Both**: Things in common,

**Squall**: (Stepping forward) there just ain't one.

**Both**: (Rinoa twirls into Squall again) But when we get together, we have nothing but fun.

**Rinoa**: I take two steps forward

**Squall**: I take two steps back

**Both**: (Rinoa goes at arm's length) We come together 'cause

**Squall**: (She twirls in) opposites attract and you know

**Rinoa**: It ain't fiction,

**Squall**: just a natural fact.

**Both**: We come together cause opposites attract (part)

**Rinoa**: Two steps forward.

**Squall**: Two steps back.

(They start doing the Waltz for the Moon dance, faster)

**Both**: We come together 'cause opposites attract and you know

**Rinoa**: It ain't fiction,

**Squall**: just a natural fact.

**Both**: We come together 'cause opposites attract.

The music keeps going as the couple dance around the stage.

Zell and Quistis are really drunk

"Ya know, Quisty, they can sing," Zell said, swaying from side to side.

"Yeah, Zell. Gimme five."

She raised her hand. A waiter ran and placed five drinks on the table. Zell raised his hand to slap hers, but instead of hitting her hand, he missed and bopped her head, knocking her out. He laughed hysterically, and then saw the drinks.

"Good service."

The couples went back to singing.

**Both**: You know it

**Rinoa**: Baby

**Squall**: Baaaaabe

**Both**: We come together

A dinosaur runs through the stage screaming, followed by Selphie and a staggering Zell.

**Both**: We come together

**Rinoa**: Baby ain't it something that we've lasted this long?

**Squall**: (twirls her under his arm and lets go, stepping forward) You and me, proving everyone wrong.

**Rinoa**: (stepping forward) Don't think we'll ever get our differences patched (steps back)

**Squall**: Don't really matter, cause we're perfectly matched.

**Rinoa**: I take two steps forward

**Squall**: I take two steps back

**Both**: We come together, 'cause opposites attract and you know (waltz)

**Rinoa**: It ain't fiction,

**Squall**: just a natural fact.

**Rinoa**: Two steps forward

**Squall**: Two steps back

**Both**: We come together, 'cause opposites attract and you know

**Rinoa**: It ain't fiction

**Squall**: just a natural fact

**Both**: We come together cause opposites attract (come apart)

**Squall**: Two steps forward, (He steps forward) two steps back (He steps back and Rinoa steps forward)

**Rinoa**: Two steps back (Rinoa steps back)

**Squall**: We come together cause opposites, opposites

**Rinoa**: opposites attract.

**Squall**: It ain't fiction; you know it's a fact

**Rinoa**: It's a fact

**Squall**: We come together, 'cause opposites ... opposites

**Both**: Two steps forward, two steps back, two steps back … opposites attract. We go together … go together, 'cause opposites attract. Two steps forward, two steps back. Two step back.

**Rinoa**: Opposites attract

**Squall**: We go together

**Rinoa**: We go together

**Squall**: We go together

**Rinoa**: We go together

**Both**: 'cause opposites opposites

**Squall**: I said opposites

**Both**: attract

**Squall**: two steps forward, two steps back

**Rinoa**: opposites attract.

The music stopped. The audience cheered.

The crowd bunched together, throwing a still unconscious Quistis about.

Selphie was chasing the dinosaur.

Zell sat on the ground and said, "Hey, you! There is a law that there are to be no more than one Selphie, so you ten get out of here!"

Irvine was behind the bar, giving out drinks to any girl that passed.

Seifer placed down his guitar and pulled out his Hyperion. Silence went through the bar. All the people went back to their seats, laying Quistis down on the floor.

"That was Squall and Rinoa singing 'Opposites Attract' by Paula Abdul. Thank you and there will be no more songs tonight."

Squall and Rinoa went back to the table with the rest of the group. Quistis was still out cold, but in her seat Selphie was hugging a large Dinosaur head and sobbing.

Zell screamed, "I don't know who you are, but I _can_ tell the difference between you and my friends ... maybe."

Then he swapped his knife with Irvine's. Irvine came back with a steak

"Hey, Squall, you really can sing," Irvine said.

Squall opened his mouth. "Whatev-OW!"

Rinoa let go of his hair.

"Um… I mean, thanks."

The night got better - Irvine choked on his steak because of the wax.

They walked out and Seifer went out to say goodbye.

"Thanks for coming to the Golden Gunblade. Oh … Squall? Come and sing any time - people love seeing the Commander make a fool of himself."

Squall glanced at Rinoa and said nothing.

The End

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